20th September

Today is the day of the wedding!
A boy in my English class, Nitin, invited me along to his best friend’s wedding tonight. An odd thing to do, but he says that I have to see at least one Indian wedding while I am here and no better time like the present. We are all so excited. Amanda is going to wear her blue silk saree she got at home, so she has had a new top made in blue fabric to match it. We don’t really know what the form is, but Nitin said traditional dress would be most appropriate probably. We asked if there was anything we could bring as well, and he said nothing. Though, I asked my mum and she said cash generally seems to be the form. I don’t know if us handing over cash would seem a little bit weird, especially when I don’t even know the bride’s name. It is a very strange setup. At home, no one would ever consider inviting their classmate to a wedding if they had never been to one. It just isn’t done. Weddings at home are all about cutting the numbers down, not about inviting everyone you have ever known, or not known for that matter. The weddings here go on for days as well, perhaps a few extras on one night of it doesn’t cause much issue. Apparently there will be about 500 people there.
Spent the day reading in Coffee Day. I am too excited to work really. We went to Chinese Bowl again for some Thukpa. Probably good to eat now rather than wait till we are there, as there may not be any food. I picked up some fruit on the way home as well. I am very happy: I have apples and bananas now! I feel my vitamin content has completely disappeared in recent days, so I am hoping some fruit will provide me with a bit of health. I can eat it chopped up with my muesli in the mornings! So civilized.
Tonight we will be wearing our sarees properly! I have studied some more and I think I can tie them now and not in an inappropriate way. Lauren and Amanda congregated in my room and we spent about an hour wrapping them in. So, to tie a saree: Start with it going from right to left round your body twice, tucking it in to your petticoat. Then when you are back at the front after 2nd time round, pleat it five times. The pleats should be quite sharp, I think you can iron them in place. Then tuck the pleats in to the front, twisting them so that the saree fabric continues on out from the left hand side of the folds. Then wrap round once more, tucking it in as you go until you reach your right side. Then draw the remaining fabric over your left shoulder. Take the ends of this (you need someone else I think for this) and fold into pleats again, so that the part going over your chest and shoulder is about 7 inches thick. Then put over your shoulder over your chest (no boob showing!!) and pin. The shoulder part is the only bit you should need pins for. And that is you: in a saree! We had to be shown the last part by a girl in the hostel from Sri Lanka. She knew how to tie Indian style sarees as well as Sri Lankan style, which does its pleats differently. We will have to try it sometime.
Nitin and his friend picked us up as promised in a tiny little Subaru that apparently was the most fuel efficient and cheap car on the planet until it was overtaken by the Tata Nano (a toy car as far as I can tell). We all packed into the back of the car and immediately had to roll all the windows down, It is very hot again. We don’t know what has caused it, but the temperature has returned to early August levels and it is not very pleasant. We drove for what must have been a hour and a half, getting lost all the time and having to double-back and ask directions. It is quite nice that you can ask directions really easily here; everyone is willing to help, unlike home. When you call out for something, you shout ‘bhaia!’, which means ‘brother’, or if it is an older man, you shout ‘uncle!’. Women don’t get asked it would seem, surprisingly enough… We eventually made it to Gurgaon though. We three were by that point sitting in a pool of our own juices. Not very attractive I must say. Apparently the whole thing is outside though, so at least we might dry off when we get out the car.
Gurgaon is one of the sub-cities of Delhi. It looks like canary wharf, and I was surprised to see some of the signs on the skyscrapers. There is a Price Waterhouse Coopers in Delhi. Very odd. We drove for yet more time until we came to a place called Tivole Farm. It was not a farm, or anything close. It was an open space with some grass over it, completely covered in fairy lights and glitter and flowers. It was in the middle of a busy street that was full of little stalls selling red rags with gold fringe and rice for people to offer up to the Goddess of the shrine it was next to. We went into the compound and were shown over to the main stage. There were little stages everywhere, but there was one main one with the bride and groom on it having their photo taken with everyone who was there. They looked amazing. They had little throne-style chairs and there were flowers everywhere. The groom was wearing a brown silk kurta with sequins designed all over the chest and arms. He had on a white turban style hat with lots of fringing and beading hanging off it. The bride was wearing a pink and green sequined saree. She was covered in jewelry: huge bangles have way up her arms, necklaces and hair ornaments. She had on a huge hoop through her nose as well that was attached to her earring and took up half her face. She had on some particular bangles that had these sort of lamp shaped things hanging down from her wrists. They were very heavy, and apparently the bride is meant to shake them on your face and that is the same as tossing the bouquet. She had done all her make up herself (though obviously not the henna, which was all over her shoulders, hands and feet) and she looked really pretty. They were about 25 I think, not too young. After we had met the couple, Nitin took us round the rest of the complex. There were stalls everywhere with Indian snacks, fruit and juice. We stopped to get some fruit and lychee juice, and then Nitin made me try an Indian sweet that he said Indian women go crazy for. It is a kind of hollow gram flour sphere with a hole in the top. You put a sort of spicy liquid syrup into it, and then eat it whole. It was disgusting. I tried it, and it was so salty and absolutely horrifying. I didn’t realise spicy meant salty. Why does this country insist on putting either too much salt or too much sugar in things that were never meant to have salt in the first place?! Sweets should not be salty! Ugh. I had to go get some more juice to wash my mouth out. Nitin found all this hilarious. We went to some of the other stalls and Amanda and Lauren got some other traditional snacks, but I couldn’t stomach anything else at that point. After walking around for a while we went to sit on one of the little pavilion things. We weren’t sitting for long though when Chor Bazari came on and Lauren, Nitin and I went up to dance for a bit. It was great fun. I have never seen men dance like that. Nitin tried to show us some Punjabi dances and he is going to make us a CD. I showed him the Gay Gordons in reciprocation and he thought it was just amazing despite it being the simplest dance in the Scottish repertoire. Lauren ended up having a dance-off with one of the older male relatives as well. We had to go sit down again eventually though as we were getting too tired and also being stared at by elderly relatives. A little self-conscious… The mother of the bride came to find us and ranted at us until we agreed to eat some more food. Everyone here has been so nice to us despite our total lack of connection to them. An outsider would never have been invited to a Scottish wedding: our weddings are about cutting down, not adding on to, the bill.
Tried my first ever pan this evening as well. Pan is a betel leaf with aniseed and mint and all sorts in it, all mushed up together. You chew it. Some pan has loads of this particular stuff that makes you spit red. Some has tobacco and some has hash in it as well. These were digestive pan, and I assume there was no tobacco or anything in them as wee kids were munching on them. It was an interesting experience. You just chew and chew and chew until all the juices come out. We all had on a look of complete confusion and bemusement. Very weird. Not unpleasant, just strange. I don’t think I will have one again…
We managed to see part of the ceremonies as well. The groom was being pasted and eating different concoctions given to him by the priests, and then the bride was allowed to join him and began to get pasted as well. It was very interesting to watch, but we couldn’t hear the chants very well.
Unfortunately we had to leave before the end of the ceremonies, as Nitin’s friend is Muslim and he needed to get back in preparation for Eid tomorrow. Nitin has been fasting too, but I am unsure as to whether he is actually religious or not. The self-discipline needed to fast for a month really is amazing. The girls in the hostel are all very excited for tomorrow as well. We get a special dinner to celebrate, which is good for them as they are all starved!
Got back to the hostel at 2 am, thoroughly exhausted. We had so much fun. If ever there is a way to repay Nitin we will have to do it. He mentioned taking us all to get cake and see a movie some time soon, so we will have to go and buy him some cake ourselves or something. Had an amazing night.